Hit Her With The Pig


  B                  Eb        E
I know it seems like nobody is home
          B               Eb               E
But I'm a bit tied-up and can't get to the phone
B                  Eb          E                D
There's this scary bird, and I know this sounds absurd
          B                       B
But she's kidnapped me, and won't set me free

E                      F#7
I didn't suss it was a trap
B7           A7             E
Oh God, I've been so bloody crap
E                       F#7
She pulled my Les Paul, down from the wall
B7        A7           E
And sat a laptop on my lap

E                            F#7
She said she wouldn't set me free
B7      A7           E
Until I wrote a new CD
E                    F#7      
Of brand-new tracks, recorded back to back
B7                A7       E
Songs of love for my sweet misery

      B                  Eb        E
And I know it seems that nobody is home
          B               Eb               E
But I'm a bit tied-up and can't get to the phone
    B                      Eb
And there's this girl that holding me
      E               D
She's pumping me with LSD
    B                        B
And giving me shocks, for my writer's block

E                                 F#7
She made some toast and scrambled eggs
B7         A7            E
I ate them up and then I begged
E                 F#7
Please let me go, no one will know
B7           A7               E
She said she break both of my legs

      B                  Eb        E
And I know it seems like nobody is home
      B               Eb
I'm a bit tied-up and can't get to the phone
    B                Eb                    E            D
And there this crazy chick and I know this sounds quite sick
           B                     B
But what I wouldn't give, for an iron pig

C  Ab G G  / C Ab G G

("what are you sitting there staring into space for?
You're on my time now, you dirty bird.
I want a verse and a chorus before tea-time dearie
And I want to read every word")

         C                     Ab
I took a butter knife that I'd hid in my back wallet pocket
        G                         G
Made a lunge for her back but she knocked me to the ground
    C   
She punched me in the face
             Ab                        G                         G
But from the corner of my eye, I could see my salvation, I could see my salvation
C                     C
Hit her with the pig, hit her with the pig!
C                     C
Hit her with the pig, hit her with the pig!

(trumpet break)
Ab7                       C#7 B7   F#
        I'm FREEEEEE, 

F#                         Ab7
Bye bye baby, I'm glad you died
C#7     B7                F#
I don't hate you though I tried
F#                            Ab7
So long sweetheart, don't get wrong
      C#7               B7                 F#
If it weren't for you I wouldn't have this song

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